Makeshift Thistle Grubber

Posted by Nick  | 04 Jun 2014  | 0 comments

I don’t know why, but for some reason I had been fantasising for a time about grubbing thistles, even before we got the farm. The idea of casually strolling through the paddocks laying waste to the prickly invaders excited me. I think it’s a combination of feeling like I’m defending the farm of noxious weeds and a latent masculine impulse to destroy something. You can imagine my delight then when an old rusty hoe head turned up whilst I was cleaning under the cottage. I left what I was doing and dove into the bush looking for a suitable branch to act as my grubber handle.

I’ve always had a fascination with creating things out of sticks. Spears, staves, clubs. I once fashioned a good-and-proper walking stick out of puriri wood for the five-day Tongariro Northern Circuit we hiked. It was more than just an aid; it was a kind of primeval talisman. There’s something about the simplicity of a good stick that just speaks to me. I don’t know. It’s a caveman thing.

There’s only a small group of trees near the cottage so I didn’t have much choice when it came to the handle of my makeshift grubber. I emerged with a gnarly limb and began cutting it down to size and filing it in the right way so the hoe head would hold in place as the stick widened. I cut a cleft in the end and made a wedge to put pressure on the hoe head, then jammed in a couple of screws for good measure. After I sharpened the metal edge it was ready for action.

Doesn't look like much, but it holds firm.
Doesn’t look like much, but it holds firm.
Not straight you say? Hey, it's rustic.
Not straight you say? Hey, it’s rustic.

We’re quite lucky in that our pastures are relatively free of noxious weeds. There’s a few species here and there, but as far as grazing land goes it’s in very good order. The predominant weed seems to be Scotch thistle, whose seeds have spread from neighbouring farms where they aren’t supressed. We were concerned at first that the thistles might be of the Californian variety, which can’t be chipped like their Scotch cousins. Californian thistle pop up in groups and have large interconnected root systems. If you take a grubber to them they’ll just bounce right back or sprout elsewhere. Herbicide is really the only effective method of keeping them down, and even then they’re persistent little shits.

Scotch thistle, on the other hand, has a tap root. So long as you chip below the “crown” and remove all the dormant buds they won’t regrow (I wish I had known this before I spent a couple of afternoons on my mum’s block painstakingly uprooting hundreds of the buggers). Being biennials it’s important to slaughter them when in their first year as young rosettes, before they shoot up and go to seed. Otherwise you can expect a hell of a lot more popping up about the place.

Scotch thistle rosette.
Scotch thistle rosette.

We went for a late afternoon stroll over the farm with the new makeshift thistle grubber, grubbing to our hearts’ content. It held up well, the hoe head not wiggling in the slightest after hundreds of blows. We easily spent over an hour out there and only made a dent in the ranks of the thistle army, but if we take the grubber whenever we go for a stroll we should keep on top of them. It’s surprisingly fun playing spot the thistle. You see one in the distance and race towards it, brutally hacking it out of the ground. Each kill feels like a victory for your farm – you’ve slowed the invasion. It’s quite therapeutic.

Eager for thistle destruction.
Eager for thistle destruction.
Char getting an audience as she prepares for battle.
Char getting an audience as she prepares for battle.

Buried Mysteries

Posted by Nick  | 03 Jun 2014  | 0 comments

A public holiday gave us another three-day weekend down at the farm, which we happily spent pottering about. Our families visited from Auckland and we delighted in showing them around. It’ll be great when the cottage is made more comfortable for visitors (not to mention ourselves), so we can have friends and family over more often. Everything is very basic at the moment. We only just upgraded our bed from an inflatable air mattress to a couple of foam mattresses pushed together, for instance. We’re making do without a fridge and a couch for the time being as well. At least we have hot running water, electricity, and a wood burner!

Having spent the Saturday and Sunday with our families we only had Monday to busy ourselves. We washed the car (wow, having the space just to do this simple task is underrated), cleaned the smoky oven that smelled like burnt pork chops, and made a start on cleaning out under the cottage. The lawn needed a mow, too, so we repaired our old push mower which had rusted over after being buried by rats in our garden shed back at our unit in the city. We gave it a thorough water-blasting, sharpened its blade with a Dremel, and then drenched it in CRC. After a few pushes it was like new. We’re not fans of lawns (too much maintenance for what they’re worth to us), but we’ll have to keep on top of the lawn around the cottage until we do some landscaping.

Buried by the excavations of tunnelling rats, our push mower has seen better days.
Buried by the excavations of tunnelling rats, our push mower has seen better days.
After a bit of TLC it purrs like a kitten. Mower works now, too.
After a bit of TLC it purrs like a kitten. Mower works now, too.

Whilst cleaning out under the house I discovered a pile of broken plaster board that had been buried. I dug and dug, seeing no end to the muddy heap. Along with the fragments of board I also yanked out an old folding chair, various sweet wrappers, corrugate sheets, chunks of stone and bricks, and a bunch of wooden stakes. What was it all for? Why was all this crap buried here in particular? I half expected to find a dead body that someone had gone to the trouble of concealing beneath a pile of rubble. Before long there was this gaping hole beneath the house, with yet more trash to be excavated. It seemed there was no end to it, so I stopped to think. Then it hit me…

Mystified.
Mystified.

I recalled being told that there had been a coal range in the cottage before electricity had reached the area. The cottage was built atop wooden supports, which couldn’t have held up the weight of the cast iron coal range. Then I remembered the giant concrete block that had been unceremoniously discarded near the driveway. This hole… this rubbish pit… had once been the home of that very same concrete block that had supported the weight of the coal range in the kitchen. Of course! Realising that I would have to be digging for quite some time and having nothing more appropriate to fill the hole with, I left the problem for another day…

The large concrete coal range support that must have filled the hole, dumped nowhere in particular.
The large concrete coal range support that must have filled the hole, dumped nowhere in particular.

Another mystery is these pipes that just pop out of the yard haphazardly. At first we thought they weren’t connected to anything and were merely a remnant of the water tower that stands, now tank-less and disused, above them. They were buried, so naturally we began trying to yank them out of the earth. This was foolhardy and we quickly learnt that we were being deceived. The pipes had nothing to do with the water tower at all – in fact they were connected to our water tanks! We unearthed a valve, matted with grassroots, and spun it open. The pipe gushed out fresh water. What…? Was it meant to act as a hose, or a way to purge the water tanks? We don’t know.

So… let’s just leave them alone for now, too. We have no idea how everything is connected; our entire plumbing/drainage looks like it wasn’t done professionally, just thrown together over the years. The previous owner couldn’t even tell us exactly where the septic system is. I think we’ll just take a step back from trying to fiddle with a setup that’s obviously working well enough…